Did you know that most people find their first holiday season post-divorce the most challenging? If you’re among them, you’re not alone. Christmas, a time traditionally reserved for family gatherings, can amplify feelings of loneliness and separation. But there’s hope, and there are strategies to not just endure but thrive during this time.
My first Christmas post-divorce was a turning point. Struggling with money and missing my children, I nearly gave up on the festive season. However, a simple act of buying a small Christmas tree transformed my outlook. It wasn’t just about celebrating; it was a statement of resilience and hope. This tree was more than a decoration; it was a symbol of my journey towards a new chapter in life.
7 Empowering Tips
Give Yourself a Break: Recognise that sadness is part of the healing process. Allow yourself to feel and express these emotions. Remember, it’s okay to not be okay.
Action Step: Write down your feelings in a journal or share them with a trusted friend.
Surround Yourself with Support: Choose to spend time with people who uplift and inspire you. Positive company can significantly affect your outlook.
Action Step: Make plans to meet a friend who makes you laugh.
Create a Second Christmas for Your Kids: Remember, the date is less important than the experience. Celebrating on an alternate day can be just as joyful and memorable.
Action Step: Plan a special activity or tradition for your alternative celebration.
Change Your Perspective: How you think influences how you feel. Look for the positives in your situation and focus on them.
Action Step: Each morning, list three things you’re grateful for.
Do Something for You: Reconnect with your interests or explore new hobbies. This time is an opportunity for self-discovery and growth.
Action Step: Dedicate 30 minutes each day to a hobby or interest.
Plan for the Future: Use this time to set goals for the upcoming year. Visualise what you want your future to look like and take steps towards it.
Action Step: Write down three goals for the next year.
Get Back Up: Embrace resilience. Life is about how you respond to challenges. Take control of your holiday season and create new, joyful memories.
Action Step: Create a new holiday tradition that signifies your resilience.
Your journey through divorce or separation is unique, and so is your path to healing. This holiday season, I encourage you to embrace these tips and find what works best for you. Here are some resources if you need to talk to someone over the Christmas holidays:
Shout 85258
Confidential, anonymous text support service which you can text if you are struggling to cope and need to talk to trained volunteers, day or night.
Text: 85258
Samaritans
You can get in touch about anything that’s troubling you. If you need someone to talk to, Samaritans listen – they don’t judge or tell you what to do.
Phone: 116 123
Refuge
Helpline for women who have experienced domestic abuse and violence. All female advisors can support you and help to find refuge accommodation.
Phone: 0808 200 0247
Respect
Advice and support for men who have experienced domestic violence and abuse by a current or ex-partner or family member.
Phone: 0808 801 0327